Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Excuses,excuses

Haven't posted in forever,
because I've been too busy
biting
my
tongue.
I'm pretty sure it's close to severing,
but God forbid I take off the pressure
lest I can't stop it from flapping
once
I
do.

Given that this is a public blog
(yeah. . . what a stupid idea that was)
and given that I am trying
very,
very,
VERY
hard to keep quiet when I have nothing nice to say,
I have found just avoiding my blog is
the most surefire tactic to keeping
the
hell
shut
up.
I used to
go to a gym
where I would
Punch
and
Kick
the hell out of a bag.
While repeating different
cathartic
and
profane
mantras in my head.
Repeatedly.
Several times a week.
Now, with 6 weeks of complete shoulder/arm rest,
I have lost that outlet.
I need that outlet, people!

Life would be SO much easier
if God had attached a
Bullshit Meter
to everyone's forehead.
Then we would know
when a pile is being dumped
on us
looonnnnggg before the
smell
hits
us.
I apologize if this is a
tedious
melodramatic
or
cryptic post.
Those suck, I know.

SO,
here are a few tangible things
I promise to post about
soon:

* The Dark Art of Taking the Low Road

* Christian Homeschool Children who. . . gasp. . .lie to their mothers
who have never left the prairie and think that their
precious, innocent angels would never yell or. . .
worse....
say a certain word


* Me Kicking a Lying Christian's Homeschool Mom's A$$
when she falsely accuses my daughter

* A potential podcast involving
knitting
wining
wit
&
creative profanity

So stick around!
PLUS!
There's always the potential
if my therapist cannot help me find a way
to process all this bullshit I've been trying to deal with
I just may go back to the
tried
and
true
method
of blogging it,
fallout be damned.
(But srsly, that would not be the adult way to handle it.)

This Weeks' Theme Song
(because everyone should have a weekly theme song)
is:
Dammit
by
Blink 182

(And srsly, I AM NOT REFERENCING my marriage
by posting this song.
It's just a damn catchy song
and the chorus "I guess this is growing up"
and "I turn to a friend who sees through the Master Plan"
is my theme to help me get through this week
because I'm doing a whole bunch of stuff
that I really
really
really
don't want to deal with.)

1 comment:

stellarparenting.com said...

hope there is some wonderfully squishy yarn taking the edge off of things, how many days till Orlando?