Thursday, October 09, 2008

Update

The birth parent interview did NOT happen.

Our director, children and birth moms went to USCIS for the interview. They waited.

And waited.

And waited.

They were told to come back Friday.

For those of you new to our adoption saga, our birth moms did not show up for two prior appointments, one back in August, the other early September. Then they disappeared for a month,, and every contact our orphanage director had for them, all of whom were able to reliably contact them for the past 2.5 years, had no idea where they were.

I rarely speak of my faith on my blog. I'm a fairly new Christian, and I feel a bit clumsy with my thoughts and ineloquent with prayer. I still feel pretty private about the whole thing. But today I'm going to share something.

Last month was tough for me. The moms up and disappeared and we had no idea what was going to happen or when it could happen. This situation was so large and out of our hands and seemingly impossible.

I went and sought counsel with one of our pastors at Church.

"You need to get on your knees and pray," I was told. "Pray, cry, beg, plead for our good Lord to send angels down to pick up these mothers and deliver them to the doorstep of your orphanage. Nothing is too big for our God. We will pray this with you."

So I did. I prayed and prayed.

And waited and waited.

And on Sunday night, those angels delivered these women out of the middle of nowhere.

Nothing is too big for our God.

Right now I am exhausted. And a bit scared. And troubled. And saddened by only sharing downer news.

And mostly, I just want my babies home.

It feels so good and comforting and reassuring to know that I can hand it over. That I do not need to carry these burdens. That I am not the one in control.

As devastating as the thought is that the birth parent interview may not happen tomorrow, or the next time, or the next time, I know that angels picked them up once and brought them in. And those angels will be sent for again. I truly believe that the Lord has big, beautiful plans for these boys, and nothing will stand in the way of that.

I will be on my knees praying for these big, beautiful plans to start unfolding right now.

Nothing is too big for our God.


9 comments:

Sophia said...

I am speechless. How can news be so good and so bad all at the same time????

bbbunch said...

Oh Sarah...

We are on our knees praying with you. It is out of our control, but NOTHING is to big for Him!

Always here for you!
Beck

Julie said...

So cool that you are seeing Him work in the midst of the battle! For us too this is still a journey of faith and prayer, and some times I really struggle. BUT HE is so much bigger.
Keep pressing on.

Sawatzky Kids said...

Very well said Sarah!
Plese know that there are so many of us on our knees for your family, nothing is to big for Him all we have to do is hand it over.
Shelly

Melanie said...

This daily devotional reminds me of you -

Love is just as quick way to say, "I have hope for you."
You can say those words. You are a flood survivor.
By God's grace you have found your way to dry land.
You know what it's like to see waters subside.
And since you do, since you passed through a flood and lived
to tell about it, you are qualified to give hope to someone
else.

I know you have been through floods and are in the middle of this storm, but you will find dry land and you will be a mighty hope and testimonial to others!

You are amazing and God LOVES you and God LOVES your boys.

Amanda said...

Praying for the interview to happen and bring relief to your heart. God is too wise to be mistaken, too good to be unkind. Sometimes from our viewpoint it's so easy to question. Continue to trust His word. Cling to His promises :~)

TJ Aguon said...

We will also pray for you and your family. Your pics of the kids are great. They are getting so big. Tell my cuz that I said hey and kisses to the kids.
TJ Aguon

Anonymous said...

We will also pray for you and your family. Your pics of the kids are great. They are getting so big. Tell my cuz that I said hey and kisses to the kids.
TJ Aguon

Me said...

Ugh! My stomach turned to knots when I read this. The hardest thing for me is faith-trusting that my prayers are heard, trusting in His ways, in His timing. I struggle with it a lot. But I also know He does hear our prayers and all will come together in His perfect timing.

I know that doesn't fix things today. But guess what? Tomorrow is Friday. I'll be praying the bp's show up again and this can be completed tomorrow.

Love ya!
Lila