Thursday, July 31, 2008

Pity Party

Okay, so yesterday I actually made a commitment to be cheerful in the midst of this (adoption) trial. Stupid of me, I know, and certainly asking for trouble. And guess what?!? Today I heard news that was the straw that broke this camel's back.

Lest any of you think I'm waiting through this end process with nerves of steel and great emotional fortitude, I just finished a big crying, sniveling breakdown on the phone with the Mister (so recent that I'm still sniffling here). Here's why:

We still don't have a correct passport. Okay, I can handle that. BUT, BUT, BUT, there are a few other steps that should be going on concurrently with this passport wait. A big one being the birth parent interview, which could have been done at any time after we filed our Visa paperwork way back in May.

But, here we sit, 2.5 months later and nearly a month after exiting MOI, with NO interview scheduled. Finally given the go-ahead, our dear Sara E. attempted to make the appointment, only to be told that she no longer could and that ONLY the orphanage director could make the appointment.

This is a nearly comical idea. NOT because the orphanage director isn't a hard worker--she's the hardest worker I know. But because it is damn near impossible to easily get a hold of a person at the U.S. Consulate to make the appointment! And Marie is soooooo insanely busy running an orphanage that it really doesn't make sense to 1) ask her to do such a menial task and 2) expect her to be able to sit around her desk all day trying to get through to the Consulate.

So, if this is the case, I expect it will be a good deal of time before we can get a birth parent interview. The birth parent interview, the medical visit, the paperwork translation, the file review: all these steps done concurrently, and you can be done in 3-8 weeks. But to do this not concurrently, but one after another, well, I don't even want to add that up.

My heart sank as my brain told it, "Better kiss an August pick up good bye!"

That little thought was the big, bad catalyst for my sad, pathetic breakdown.

I'm a lucky gal to be married the Mister. He deciphered my story though my sobs, said, "Babe, we are 95 yards into a 100 yard race. The last 5 yards are always the worst, but we're gonna do it."

I know he's right. This is but just a blip on the timeline in terms of our life with the boys. A teeny, tiny little blip. But this Mama's heart hurts. I just want my little boys home.

But, Haiti is Haiti, and tomorrow is another day. And while the bad news is that the Consulate is difficult and always changing the rules, the good news is that the Consulate is difficult and always changing the rules. Just because someone wouldn't let Sara E. make the appointment today, doesn't mean that someone else won't be kind enough to set an appointment for me if I call tomorrow. But in the long run, does it matter? Hard to tell, but probably not.

Sara E. said it best. We're an airplane, circling the PAP airport. Just without a detailed flight plan telling us to land.


Jen said...

I am so sorry that you are going through all of this. I can totally understand the feeling of being so out of control. I hated it. I know that M seems to be a bit crazed and busy and you surely feel she can't possibly get all that needs to be done, done. But she does and she will.....

Janet said...

I sure your tired of hearing hang it there but they do come home. I was surprised to hear people are making there own appointments when M is the only one that can find the parents and get them there. Our interview was set up by here at the end when we were there for that long month. IMO that makes the most since because most of the appointments have been missed that adoptive parents have made. Is M aware of this new rule?