Tuesday, February 12, 2008

It's a Bird, It's a Plane. . .


That was the noise I heard coming from downstairs, while I was upstairs this morning changing bedsheets before we began schooling. I assumed that one of the cats was up on our fireplace mantle and knocked off one of my candles, which they do on a near daily basis, always sounding very much like the sound I just heard.

Atticus came running upstairs. "Mom!" he shrieked. "Something fell!"

Let me reiterate: SHRIEKED.

"Yes, I know, it was probably just the cat knocking something over." The little guy gave me a blank look and then tore out of the room. I could hear him consulting with Hatfield. Moments later, I could hear him thudding back upstairs.

"MOM! Something fell outside. Out of the SKY!" he shrieked, even louder than the first time, which I never would have thought possible.

I followed him back down the stairs, where Hattie met us. "Something landed on the deck," she confirmed.

My mind instantly flashed to the movie, Chicken Little, when the Ugly Duckling reminisced about the time when frozen pee fell out of an airplane. Please Lord, I prayed, don't let it be frozen airplane pee.

Unfortunately, it was this:

Our chimney cap.

The thought of the Mister, my honey who also happens to be Mr. Sole Wage Earner, climbing up onto our cold, icy, steeply pitched roof gives me major anxiety. The thought of all the ice, snow and melting snow slowly working its way into chimney as our very expensive heat shoots up and out the chimney and into the stratosphere, further ups that anxiety level up another notch or two.

Upon investigating the chimney cap, I deemed it truly trashed, short of us purchasing a welding tool of some sort. Now, if I don't even allow the Mister to use my vacuum, y'all know I'm NOT going to allow him to bring a welding tool into our home.

So, once again, we will be breaking the Compact. Which stinks, I know, but I'd rather break the Compact than create structural damage to the fireplace while losing all of our heat.

Funny how frozen airplane pee is suddenly seeming like a preferred falling object.


small town girl said...

You are hilarious! But you are doing the right thing. You simply cannot give him a welding tool!

Sawatzky Kids said...

I personally feel that anything that breaks off your home and causes children to come shreiking into rooms warrants breaking the no spending contract! LOL
Hope it all turns out okay!
Shelly and gang

Jen said...

I, on the other hand think Cliff + Blow-Torch = good times!